Stuff

Roundup time…

Seems pretty official that Kjetil Waehler is on his way, it’s been confirmed in one or two sources. So yet another unpronouncable name. And you thought Detzi Krusyntski (sp) was difficult to say soberly…..seems that if we don’t want to wait until October for him, we can spend £400,000 on him. Seems quite good apparently, which is always a bonus

Also as good as confirmed is Kelvin Davis, the Luton GK, after we upped our bid to £650,000. Or, as Sam Hammam would probably put it – “I fucked your wife, I was going to come then I pulled out. Then I rammed it in twice as hard and she loved it twice as much”. Or something. Makes the Sully saga even more intriguing, and looks like Drillo’s Love Child isn’t coming after all. Guess that the “daddy” chants wouldn’t go down too well.

More on Kelvin Davis (working on suitable nickname) – he was spotted down at the training ground today (Saturday) along with the rest of the first team squad. So, looks like the Drillo training techniques are as radical as first thought – according to our training ground source (Dr W.), the training looks more structured, the players look fitter and Drillo is one helluva good bloke. Far more promising than the Kinnear days, certainly, where it was midfield or nothing.

Right, dumbest rumour of the day, probably the year. It has been reported that John “I murdered that motherfucker” Hartson is the subject of an “audatious” bid from West Ham for £2m. Yes, that really does say “audatious” bid from West Ham for £2m. The very thought of letting JH go for £2m anyway is laughable enough, but to West Ham, the club who stiched him up over the Berkovic head tennis incident (if you don’t believe me, look at the way they rallied behind Berkovic), and then let his fitness and his form go to rot is rather beyond comprehension.

The only logic I can put behind this is that now Berkovic has joined Celtic and we (supposedly) have to sell to buy some more players some hack has put 2 and 2 together to get 6. Besides, at the Press Day I managed to find out that Drillo rates JH very highly and that the man himself is looking to move to SW London. Now if I, a humble, smelly lowly supporter can find out this much info, why can’t an overpaid hack? On second thoughts, I think I know the answer to that

Although not quite as annoying as Simon Mayo (the world’s most irritating man, yes even more than Chris Evans), the Cardiff Centinary thing is off, apparently because Boavista pulled out (no, not in the Sam Hammam way). So it looks like Cardiff are set to rearrange friendlies between us and Shamrock Rovers. Now this is very annoying because I already booked my train travel to Cardiff, and unless they put it on Sunday Aug 1 I’ll have to pay a surplus charge. Bastards. Even worse, this came from Cardiff City, not WFC. Fuck, are WFC that incompetent? (on second thoughts, I don’t think I should answer that….)

OK, try to keep awake, it’s more on Sully, and it looks like we could easily lose him for nowt. Basically, he refuses to sign a new contract, and we’ll be prepared to let him go this time next year on a Bosman unless somebody is dumb enlightened enough to pay £4m for him before then. I would next season like to see someone like Heald get more of a run out, because I’m not too sure that Sully will be 100% committed next year, and anyway he makes too many (ahem) lapses of judgement. What’s the betting that Drillo’s Love Child will be our first choice goalie come Christmas?

Meanwhile, it’s official – JFK has gone to Man Shitty for (eventually) £1.5m. I say “eventually” because it’s one of those appearance type transfers (ie play 100 games consecutively and we get an extra £1.50, that kind of thing). Shame he’s gone, because I was always a fan of his. I think that Michael Hughes kept him out of the team and he wasn’t prepared for another season of bench warming, so I suppose this was the best move for him. Plus, he always shined against first division teams – his game against Bolton last year was one of the best I’ve seen from a Dons player in a long while. At least he’ll get to show his talents in front of the Loyalist Fans In The Countryâ„¢

You may have noticed from reading Teletext etc that we’re £2m in debt, and that we may have to sell players to buy some more. Or to put it in perspective, Leeds United are currently £16m in debt and Man United have been put into a position where they may have to sell one of their players to buy some more because of OT redevelopment. Take with heavy pinch of salt and remember that we’re definitely not as bad off as a lot of more “fashionable” clubs

Papers this week full of Drillo, which concentrates on the trivial, namely his welly fetish, the fact that he rides a bike, his geography is perfect and that he is a commie bastard. I guess that the press don’t want to make themselves look foolish by slagging his style of play off – remember that apart from Perry and to a lesser extent JFK, it’s still more or less the same group of players that were getting their arses kissed at the beginning of last season. On second thoughts, it’s probably because Joe Kinnear was an ex-Spurz man, and the press would rather close down than say anything nasty about their beloved Tottenham Hotspurz. Whatever, Drillo has real potential to be Harry Mark II, and I’m going to luv it

We’ve signed Luton Town’s Chris Wilmott for between £200k and £300k, depending on who you read. However, there seems to be conflicting reports as to whether we’re signing Kelvin Davis. Teamtalk say yes, Sam Hammam says no. Hammam reportedly had a meeting with Davis and his agent on Sunday, it looked like the deal was going ahead, then on Monday the agent calls and says the deal’s off. Or as SH put it – “it’s like me fucking your wife and as I’m about to come I withdraw”. Well, it’s better than calling the bid derisory. Anyway, it appears that Drillo still wants his love child – Frode Olsen – to come (stop it) to us in October, the end of the Norge season. So Sully may yet go, Rangers is being touted now. We could well hold onto Sully until October, or not. Jesus, this thing’s getting worse and worse.

Backroom merry-go-round. Lars Tjaernaas is our new #2, nothing new. However, he will be joined by Mick Harford, and it seems that David Kemp has left for pastures new. Good fucking riddance, DK was utter crap, and what possessed Kinnear to have DK as Terry Burton’s replacement is anyone’s guess. I suppose we ought to wish him well, it’s not very nice losing your job, though I’m sure DK will find work outside football somewhere. Head coach at Palace?

Looks like JFK, aka Mark Kennedy is on his way. Training ground rumours state that he’s off to Man Shitty for £1.6m. At least he can resurrect his career there, though at this rate he’ll have gone through more resurrections than Jesus H. Christ.

One player definitely gone is Peter Fear, free transfer to Oxford United. Fearo was the new George Best, off the field that is, and that’s why he never got a game. No bitterness here of course, he told BBC Thames Valley FM that “I was never fully appreciated at Wimbledon”. Er yeah, I’m sure we were really churlish to ignore a player who had a chance and blew it through the use of beer.

He also reckons that “I can get 40 or 50 games under my belt next year”. I assume he means soccer games and not drinking games. He did leave us with a nice parting comment, saying that Oxford is “just like Wimbledon in the old days”. I wonder what era he meant? 80-81, where we were stone broke, having to collect money in blankets at HT to buy a new player and getting shafted by the council in trying to get a new stadium. Yeah, I suppose it is like the good old days……

Watford first game of the season is going to be fun. Only 1,200 tickets are on sale (apparently), and even we can take at least 2,000. It’s supposed to be the same for all Prem clubs this year – Watford only holds 16,000 or so. Expect 1 per season ticket style applications and a £22 price fee.
And finally, got to see our new kit this week. It looks quite nice, I have to say, C***y G**g logo aside. Even the Tiny thing doesn’t really bother me quite so much as when I first saw it, though seeing Tore Pedersen, JH and Carl Leaburn with Tiny is still as disconcerting as ever.

Tore Pedersen has finally been confirmed as our new CB, after Judas Perry left for the greenback. So, what do we know about TP? Well, he’s 29, he’s Norwegian, Drillo rates him, he’s played for Blackburn and Oldham, plus Eintract Frankfurt and a J-league club, plus Norway as well (he might have played in Spain but don’t quote me). Most importantly of all, he cost nothing, because he came on a Bosman. If nothing else, at least he won’t be bogged down with the “oh he’s far too expensive” tag which the muppets put on people, like JH for instance.

And finally, Drillo took his first training session Monday, and reportedly he’s not too happy with the general fitness of the team. He seems to do most of his work with the defence, which is something Kinnear would never have done. Also, Grill The Drill is tomorrow, yours truely is going, although rumours abound that if more than 6 people turn up for it they’ll call it off or something. Hmm, nice one Wimbledon, nice to see the old care for your supporters is as strong as ever