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Put the Kjetel on

Kjetil Waehler is here, at last. Unfortunately, nobody in Norway reckons he’s any good. Oh well, never stopped Neil Ardley playing for us did it? And Drillo must surely see something in him….

Drillo has now officially confirmed the inevitable : some players must be sold, though diplomatically he reckons it’s mainly to do with the wage bill. Most of our players, he says, are up for sale providing the money is right, bar the Magnifcient Six and any Drillo signings, of course. We could end up with a squad of 12 if about 18 good offers come in, but as we’ve said in the past, would that really be such a bad thing?

Anyway, who’s going to go? TT reckon that Andy Roberts, Jon Goodman, Neal Ardley, Michael Hughes and Ceri Hughes will probably be collection their P45s before long. How much could we get out of that little lot? About £1.50? Interesting aside from Drillo about what’s occuring :

“I’ve got far too many good players who will not get into the team. I know that some of them are not happy and that is not good for team spirit”

I think that many players are unhappy, but I don’t think it’s anything to do with getting into the team, I think having to train on Sundays and take a bit of professional pride in your work may have something to do with it.

Leading us on nicely to Our Greatest Ever Manager, who is lingering around like a stale fart in a lift. He’s fit and raring to go again, apparently, because he’s not “bombarding it with gallons off Guinness and greasy-spoon fry-ups.”. Obviously those nights in North London pubs and Terry Neill’s place don’t count, eh?

So, what can we expect from the mean, lean and fighting fit Joe Kinnear? Will he finally realise that yelling blue murder and creating new words for the dictionary doesn’t count as motivation? Er……

“I’ll be exactly the same. You have to smell the atmosphere of the dressing room and wake them up sometimes. I’m a master at that.”

Yeah, we gathered that. Ask Scott Fitzgerald, ask Leo, ask Chris Perry and Jason Euell. And speaking of the Spurz CB :

“‘I wouldn’t have sold Perry'”

Er, you did, didn’t you? The deal to that scummy lot was signed, sealed and delivered before you left? Nah, surely JK’s memory isn’t getting totally selective….

“Wimbledon thought they had cover for him but defence is their problem right now”.

Oops. Need I say any more? So, what of Drillo? Surely he’ll give his support to him?

“[Drillo] may have to change his style”.


“He had a magnificent record in Norway but he won’t get away with the diagonal-ball, route – one method in our Premiership any more.”

Er, worked OK at international level, worked OK for Rosenbourg against Dortmund, but obviously not in the Premiership. Jesus, this guy is fucking me off severely. Let’s see what other tidbits of history he can re-write?

“I inherited the Crazy Gang image and embraced it but I also added a more expansive style of football. We became good to watch as well as effective”

Stop laughing at the back, I’m sure that Ray Harford would be slightly annoyed by that statement as well. Coincidentally, if you think I’m waging a one-man campaign against Our Greatest Ever Manager, check out some JK-era fanzines, then maybe you’ll get a bit closer to the truth somewhat…..

JK’s homosexual sex slave, Robbie Earle MBE, is back writing for the Substandard. He doesn’t slag off Drillo this week, but he does say

“There is no substitute to playing on your ‘own’ patch. As players, there is a familiarity with your home ground that cannot be replicated elsewhere.”

I’m saying nothing.