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Seeing as though this is likely to be the last update before Saturday – you now have about 48 hours to complete the SW19 poll. I will be shutting the page off when I update on Saturday after coming back from Carrot Crunching Land : I will not accept any entries that are dated on my email after 23.59 BST on Sat 5 August. Hell, I have given you 3 months practically to do it 🙂 As for when it’ll be up? Who knows, may even be Sunday night……

We drew 1-1 against Helen Chamberlain’s side, and by all accounts it was typical pre-season fayre. JH scored for the third time in two games, apart from letting in one goal our defense reportedly looked quite solid for the first time in 2000 years. TB was reasonably happy, though his excuse for not stuffing Torquay 8-0 was that it was our second game in three days and we weren’t quite up to it. Jezus, making excuses already. Co-incidentally, we’re training at Nigel Mansell’s complex down there. I wonder if some of our players are taking personality lessons from the tached one himself?

Now, I don’t know what the hell is wrong up in Tyneside at the moment. Have they been sniffing too much sulphur from the shipyards up there (whatever ones are still open anyway)? They want first refusal on Mr 110%. For £6m. And he’s got a knee injury, which is legit and is in no way shape or form one of those ones which players who are just about to move get. Are they mad? Is Sir John Hall in some dodgy tax fiddle where he’s got to “lose” £20m? Or is this an elongated way of apologising to us for Mirandinha trying to kick the shit out of Dave Beasant in 1988. And can we have Duncan Ferguson in return please? OK, so he’s never played for Arsenal…..

Apparently, Michael Thomas hasn’t signed for us. He’s still stalling, apparently, over the contract he’s been given. Either he wants a better deal from somewhere else, or he’s still learning to read. Then again, I suppose that having been stiched up so chronically by Benfica, I probably wouldn’t blame him for taking his time.

Two interviews published today, by ex-WFC employees, one who has won stuff and one who hasn’t but is apparently the best manager we ever had and we should owe our very existance to him. On the one hand, Terry Gibson was on Teletext today, saying that clubs should look at their youth policies a lot more. He did say that WFC needed to bring back some “spirit” – getting rid of Cort and hopefully Euell will solve just about all that – but thankfully he rubbished terming it the CG spirit.

Remember that Gibbo left because Hammam did the dirty on him, which may explain a lot. On the other hand, some ex-manager of ours is slagging us off for selling Thatcher and Cort, and claiming that we won’t go up. No bitterness there. Coincidentally, the same guy may be about to take over a top international club – somebody called Cardiff City, apparently – but he says that the new owner of that place hasn’t spoken to him about it yet. Tragic.