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Look wot u Dunne

Right, who fancies being confused? Let’s see, most of you…… OK then : according to BBC Radio Merseyside, the Richard Dunne deal is OFF. He returned up to Merseyside, Walter Smith says he’s not going to Wimbledon because the two parties have failed to agree terms. Straightforward enough – disappointing, but straightforward. Now, TB goes on the OS and says that the deal is still ON. We’ve agreed terms, and he’s gone up to Merseyside purely to sort a couple of things out.

There’s no rush on the deal, says Tezza, because Dunne’s currently got a 5 match ban anyway (good start…). So, WTF is going on? Well, here’s what we do know : Double H will be an Ipshit player tomorrow because he’s passed the medical. This is according to TB and George Burley. Now, TB must be extremely confident that the deal will be Dunne (sorry) because he would not have let Double H go so “easily”. Other things to consider include the fact that their prodgical nutcase son, one Duncan Ferguson, is now back wearing Everton colours, and Everton do need the dough to pay for it. Coincidentally, that leaves a vacancy at Newk now for another striker. He needs to be English and Newk are prepared to spend £6m on him. Hmm, anyone got the Ministry of Sound’s phone number…..?

So, what else? Well, both Neil Ardley and Maggie have been giving their views on last season, Neil is blaming Drillo (“the players had no respect for him” – yeah, we gathered), whilst Maggie is actually blaming “a few” of the other players for basically acting like disinterested cunts. I know who I’m more inclined to believe.

Meanwhile, I came across some info today which may explain why we’re culling a lot of “top name” players. The Deloitte and Touche report on UK soccer came out yesterday, and it makes for some pretty shocking reading. Get this – in the 1998/89 season, you know, when OGEM was in charge, players wages were accounting for 78% of our entire TURNOVER. And people said that we could afford buying JH – I’m honestly convinced that I’m not so sure now.

Now, you work it out : Let’s assume that the average wage at WFC is about £7,500 per player : we have a paid squad of about 40 odd players. Each year, our collection of professional footballers costs us £15.6m : I’m in shock just seeing that figure on the calculator. So, let’s be generous and add all the other wages together of WFC, and that’ll work out as £17m. I can’t be arsed to work out the “in” column, but suffice to say, I reckon that even with all the sales and BRG’s projected £10m shortfall, that’s a fuckload of a deficit just from 1998/99. Who knows what it is now? This may explain why culling is taking place both on and off the pitch, and also the extreme quickness of WFC to open up TWO club shops within months of being allowed to. Remember – Uncle Ron took 100% of receipts from the SP club shop. Man, hope that hasn’t spoiled your day.

Just one final thing about this – Maggie said that SH was going to offer him a new contract with higher wages (subsequently adding to an already obscenely huge debt), yet R&G sold him simply because they didn’t want any more wage burdens. Maybe this explains TB’s transfer policy – only keep those who you really want to keep. That’s probably why you’ll never see Double H in a WFC shirt again