Well, it would be politically unsound not to wouldn’t it?
It may have been SM6 4 SW19 0. It may well have been men against boys. It may have been a whipping, though in truth it wasn’t. It may only be small seedlings, but at this present moment in time, who gives an utterly flying fuck? I don’t. You don’t. The 4600 odd who turned up don’t. Kris Stewart, Ivor Heller, Laurence Lowne, and anyone I’ve forgotten (apologies) don’t.
Tonight, I witness scenes (and my first pitch invasion since Stoke City way back in 1985) that bought a genuine smile to this hyper-cynical and otherwise miserable exterior. This feels right. Too many false dawns in the past, I feel far better now, which is why I’m doing a match report for you when I said I’d never do one again. To say I am almost close to crying is actually quite near the mark, and I never do THAT. Wimbledon are back. Koppout cannot take it away from us. Hammam couldn’t take it away from us. The FA can’t take it away. The meeja can’t take it away. Anyone who DOES take it away from us will pay. Big time. You can’t fuck with people like these. Tonight was the ultimate two fingers to everyone – and I mean EVERYONE – who has done us wrong in the past. We are on the dawn of a bright future here.
And I suppose…………………………………………………………………………………………
Plus points: The launch of AFCW. Nothing else matters, apart from the overwhelming sense of joy.
Minus points: Even I couldn’t be that churlish, surely? Well, the linesman was shit. And our goalie worries me.
The referee’s a…………..: Cunt. Well, he wasn’t, but I had to say it.
Nothing really changes: Why is it that every human being that puts on a fluorescent yellow jacket with the word “steward” on it becomes a total wazzock? Especially those who are the brothers of vice-chairmen who didn’t appreciate the abuse I gave him? Sorry, old habits really do die hard
And speaking of old habits dying hard : You know what, Koppout STILL gets it from us. Stop crying.
Truth is stranger than fiction: (1) Do you really think Sutton United have EVER produced a programme that has (a) got more features on the away team than itself, (b) looks remarkably similar to an unofficial fans programme as produced by a first division club last season, (c) is so highly sought after that it even has “Commemorative Programme” on it [see left] and (d) cost Â£2? Me neither. (2) The first pre-season game between a Ryman League and a CCL div 2 club is delayed for half-hour due to crowd congestion. (3) The first pre-season game between a Ryman League and a CCL div 2 club draws a crowd of 4600 odd. (4) The first pre-season game between a Ryman League and a CCL div 2 club will draw a bigger crowd than many if not most MKFC games at Selhurst Park next season. Be frightened. (5) The first time I can go to a game and not care about the result for the right reasons. (6) Actually, we didn’t look bad at all, considering the club hasn’t been going hardly a month, the trials have just finished officially and none of the players really know each others’ names. As I said, 4-0 flattered Sutton. (7) A lot is made about the young support at AFCW, but it was pleasing to see a lot of the old boys from PL turn up. Anyone see Ron Balch there BTW? I know Simon Balch was there.
Confession time: I haven’t a clue who our new sponsors are. I know they do the ultimate bore computer game (Championshit Manger or something obscure) because they say so (and the amount of people who STILL think they are the new Alex Ferguson due to playing CM who occasionally irritate me). Still, I will willingly accept their dough.
Chants would be a fine thing: OK then, here we go : Most of the standard chants of course, though suitably altered to include the AFC. But old habits really do take time to break – “Sack The Board” – and a couple of anti-Kris Stewart ones which were NOT started by me and by somebody infinitely more respectable than me who wasn’t far away. Honest. This is when it starts getting surreal – “We hate Raynes Park and we hate Raynes Park” was the one that springs to mind, but let’s face it, playing against Vale next season is THE biggie. What else was there? Oh fuck, anti-Koppout ones of course. Nice to see the tradition is still alive. And an anti-Palace one to boot. My.
So come on then, what about the game? Oh fuck, do I have to? Oh, all right then. It was as you would expect, though we showed some nice touches and once this team gels, it’ll be kewl. Slutton are probably too high a level for us ATM but we will reek revenge…
Anything else? Yeah, the guy (Tom, I believe) who bought me a Guinness simply because of SW19’s existance. Muchos thankos, sir, very well appreciated. Oh, and whilst I’ve always kept quiet about stuff like this, it was nice to see Chris Draper back watching a Wimbledon team.
So, was it worth it? What? A new club? New hope? All those happy faces? A feeling of belonging? Nah….
In a nutshell: I’ve seen the first AFC Wimbledon game.
So there you have it. This may be my last report ever. This may be the first of many. As in life in general, what is thrown up at you, you have to deal with. If it IS my swansong, I hope you digged it. Rest assured, I will be up Champion Hill on Saturday, my dad was born in Dulwich don’t you know….?
Honour definitely without blemish