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Howay

After being in two minds as to whether I can be arsed to write about Geordies 1 Jocks 4, I’ll give it a little bit of a go. We won 4-1, obviously, and it was reasonably comfortable enough. All that’s worth writing about the game is that Hanwell had a player go off injured after about 20 seconds, our goals came through Nathan Stamp with a shot in the box. Then Woolner, Kiwi Womble (original version) and Ricci Crace. And doesn’t he sound like somebody who presents a makeover programme? Oh, and they scored as well.

Overall, I think some will stay but quite a few will go. Not just referring to trialists either, I can’t help thinking that those who are pushed down the pecking order will want to go elsewhere to be top dog play first team football. As for those hoping to make a name for themselves, it’s best not to say. After all, the ones who you could earmark will doubtlessly not get picked after all. And besides, most of us couldn’t place them as it is.

Still, it was reasonably enjoyable. Unlike the following…

Plus points: Win. Generally played OK.

Minus points: Really not too sure about Andy Douglas, so expect him to be in the 2006 Calendar.

The referee’s a……..: There would be something majorly wrong if you remembered what the ref did in a PSF. Thankfully, he was as anonymous as the housing estate near the ground

Them: The area in which they’re in must be the only place within the London perimiter that doesn’t have any sort of chippy/kebab place within a 3 mile radius. Seriously. Food inside the ground was edible enough. Mind you, I was so hungry I could have even eaten stuff at KM. Club house felt like a scout hut, complete with paintings of Joe Jordan etc on the wall. Had four trialists from France (known on the OS as Le Trialist). No truth to the rumour they were escapees from Sangatte.

Incidentally, their nickname is the Geordies and they play in black and white. We can make an educated guess that they were formed by some ex-pat Newk fans who wanted to recreate their barcoded heroes in t’smoke. Sadly, they failed : not only have Hanwell Town actually won a trophy since colour TV became popular, but the crowd yesterday was slighly more than the amount of people who watched NUFC before Kevin Keegan became manager.

Point to ponder: Is it me or do we need another couple of games like this and Cobham before we cull the squad? Or even another Bognor type venture?

Truth is stranger than fiction: Coming back to the HT player who got injured after 20 seconds. How lousy must that be to last that short amount of time before getting injured? Proper injury as well, down for a good five minutes. Even Joe Sheerin tried to last for about a minute.

Anything else? Yes. People who read Harry Potter on the tube, especially the 5-6 people in one carriage that I was on last night. Do they consider themselves a “child at heart”? Do they play Playstation? Have they forgotten that they are an adult, with pubes and mortgages? A children’s book is for children. It’s fine for a Ritalin-dosed sprog to read it. It is not fine for a 40 something highly paid corporate nonentity at a bank in Canary Wharf to do the same. I don’t care if they’ve had a hard day and just want to relax. Snort some coke if that’s the case. Please, act your age, not your shoe size.

So, was it worth it? Well, it was an evening out.

In a nutshell: Roll on Saturday. Shame I won’t be there.