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None too phased


Arse. Wanderers 2 Static Defense 2 and yet another bloody replay in the world’s premier cup competition. Arse because we were 2-0 – two fucking nil – up and yet we were hanging on at the end. Here’s the crack – we go 1-0 up thanks to Mark Williams, who careers through the crowd. We then boss the game some more and go 2-0 up thanks to a debut goal by Wu-Tang.

Cue pandemonium and your esteemed editor maybe getting himself on the TV cameras acting like a complete loon. I’m the one wearing a leather jacket and a baseball cap. Second half, and we bossed it some more, had two good chances to make it 3-0 and you can guess the rest. So yet more fixture pileup and suffice to say I’m not happy. Come to think of it, my bank balance ain’t too happy either. Ah well….

Anyway, the long and short of it all:

Plus points: When the draw for the next round is made, our name is still in there. Bossing the game for all of the first half and about 15 minutes of the second half. Wu Tang scoring his first, here’s hoping it’s not his last. Defense for first half was pretty good.

Minus points: There is a theme tune to this game, by Phil Collins – isn’t it called “Throwing It All Away”? Severe lack of concentration cost us the game. And the fact that the referee’s guide dog was eyeing up a nearby police hound INSTEAD OF DOING ITS FUCKING JOB PROPERLY. Sorry.

Spotted: One E. Olsen at the game. Guess he must get a feeling of deja vu at the way we collapsed. Still, nice to know that he still cares about us – wonder what he thinks of WFC TB style?


Sad: Wycombe play muzik at corners to rile up the crowd. Now what lame-ass team with no sense of pride, decency and honour would sanitize their whole footballing experience by artificial and cliche rythmic percussion? (er…..)

Sad x2: Examine the picture to your right. This is the Wycombe furry mascot. Please notice the amazing similarities between it and ex-WFC pisshead John Hartson. Especially striking is the ginger hair and the rather (ahem) “stout” build of said mascot. Certainly all the cheeky WFC scamps there were pointing this out in their own unique way. Well, a quick rendition of “Are you Hartson in disguise?” was the order of the day, certainly.

Inappropiate: Singing the Champagne Song to Wycombe fans. Come on, living in Wycombe is as cheap as living in Wimbledon (ie not very).

Nice: Adams Park. Maybe a bit too cramped mind.

Says it all: The SW19 BastardMobile, in association with Nissan, Circuit City and the Rollins Band took 1 hour to get from Bucks to SW19 Towers. Which is only half an hour more than Selhurst to same destination.

Truth is stranger than fiction: Is this really Wycombe’s highest attendance ever? Certainly gate-receipt wise it is. Well, the bastards charged us £20 and £3 for a glossy series of adverts and poorly written shite commemorative matchday magazine celebrating Wycombe’s magical achievements.

Quotes: (1) “They’re all inbred” – the certain un-named Womble who contributes to this site, lives in a scummy area of London and is still demanding royalties off me, about Wycombe fans. What – just because they live in the sticks? Or because they all speak funny? (2) “Nice arse” – comment about one of the Wycombe cheerleaders (female) by an aquaintance of mine behind me. I hope for his sake the woman in question is of legal age. (3) “They have unique fans who have to suffer a lot of adversity” – Lawrie Sanchez on Crapital Old about WFC fans. I can almost forgive him for his pro-Dublin/MK comments after that. Almost.

Also: Apparently, Sanch said in a newspaper today that he lost his job at WFC because he crossed SH. No shit….

So, was it worth spending £20 to go up to deepest Bucks only to see us throw away a 2-goal cushion ensuring we’ll have to repeat the whole damn charade this coming Tuesday?: Yes, because Adams Park was my 58th (approx) new ground. No because I’m fucking sick of replays.

In a nutshell: Concentrate…..