Wait, what?
After about eight weeks of waiting for something to happen transfer wise, we’ve got not only one of our strikers but a CB as well. Two in one day, three in just over 24 hours, and your editor having to do more updates than he wants to during close season.
OK, ever.
Anyway, welcome to AFCW Tom Elliott and Karleigh Osborne. Elliott is (one of) the long awaited striker(s), whilst Osborne is a centre back. So that’s two more players who you get to identify wrongly during pre-season.
Elliott was released from Cambridge, and looks a right fucking big bastard in that photo. Reading around, he sounds another Akinfenwa type, holding the ball up etc, but some have hinted that he may be a regular starter alongside AA.
More promisingly, he’s also been called a “dirty, cheating arse”, so given the shiteness of the usual L2 ref might mean we get a few more decisions this season.
Oh, and he hit the post against Yernited at Old Trafford, a fact he happily puts down on his CV.
Eight goals in 34 appearances isn’t too shabby, especially considering Akinfenwa scored 12 from 43 games last time out. Whether this means we still need another striker, we don’t yet know.
If the briefings coming from the ITK types are correct, we do. It might mean Azeez and/or Oakley will be gathering splinters on the bench, or will find themselves on loan at Woking.
At least it’s not sodding Tanner.
The other signing has already got the nickname “Ozzy”. Well, he hasn’t, but give it time and he will. He’s a centre back, but he’s our obligatory “season long loan”.
I couldn’t help but notice that NA made pointed mention that there are no breaks in the deal with him. I know we take the piss, but I would hope that he’s learned over both Tubbs and Smith pissing off as soon as we reach New Year’s Day.
Mind you, when Tubbs first signed there was no mention of the infamous “bomb proof” comment until the 2014 Meet The Manager. So listen carefully at this year’s one (a week today, don’t forget), just to see if NA sucks his teeth and goes “well….”
There may be more to this signing than just a mere loan. Brizzle City have mentioned he has one year left on his contract, which effectively means he’s on his way out.
He’s also a London lad who apparently is/will be married, so this could be one of those ones that just happens to fall onto our lap. He used to play for Millwall, anyway, and most importantly of all – he used to play for Brentford.
That might close the door on Deji returning to us, although one questions how true that particular speculation really is. In all likelyhood, it’s just wishful thinking from those who lusted after him last season.
Watch him sign now.
Still, we are finally making signings, and ones where you can get excited about too. We’ve needed to fill up these positions sooner rather than later, and at least we can get just one more striker and one more CB, rather than still requiring 4 or 5.
It’s hard to think that we’re just over a week away from the first pre-season friendly, although it’s been close to two months since the last ball was kicked in anger.
That said, West Ham are in the Europa League tonight, and the Ashes haven’t even started yet. Rather tellingly, the game at Upton Park was £10 (fiver for kids) and is a sell-out…